Tarot Toxic?
I’m not going to beat around the bush. Tarot gets a bad wrap in some circles. I myself, have some hesitation telling friends and family what I do and create out of fear of judgement. I worry that I’ll be judged as “crazy”, “delusional” or the worst case “a con-artist”. This blog post is not about overcoming and rebutting the negative perceptions of tarot; this post is for people who are into tarot.
I know someone, you probably know someone (if not it might be you ; ) ), that is ~toxic~ when they read tarot or when they get a tarot treading.
Here’s a classic case of the toxic tarots:
Alex is infatuated with this guy. She doesn’t know what he feels towards her but she is really invested and interested him. Alex is usually level headed and has sound judgement when it comes to most things in life but because she wants this to work out so desperately, her emotional state is now dependent on whether this guy messages her back in time and in the ‘right’ way. Alex is looking for clarity on her situation-ship as she is so confused and worked up about it - it is now consuming her emotionally and mentally. (I am not being dramatic - this happens to all people when there is something we really really want so badly).
So what does Alex do? She doesn’t want to just talk to the guy and risk sounding clingy or ruin it but she needs to know if and how things are going to work out. So she gets a tarot reading from a love reader on Etsy (no shade obviously).
The reading details how they have a soul connection and might even be twin flames! That’s why he’s hot and cold! That he does feel this connection and holds Alex on a pedestal of adoration. He’s had some trauma’s in relationships previously - so he does want to be with her but there’s a reason why he replies every second or third day, cancels plans and disappears for weeks at a time.
Alex is so happy and comforted to hear this, she is validated -not rejected and all his disappointing and confusing behaviours are explained and justified now.
Don’t get me wrong, everything in the reading apparently said may be true but did it help Alex live a better life? one where her emotional state and future plans hinge on this guy replying? No.
After receiving the reading, Alex double checks with her own tarot and oracle cards. She is reading from a place of fear. Her intention is to soothe her emotional state and reassure herself that this guy is into her (because the opposite would hurt more than this confusion in the short term). She cannot be truly neutral in her reading because she is so emotionally invested right now, which is understandable. Her confirmation bias rears its head and she reads the 3 of Swords to mean his heartache, the Knight of Wands as his passion for her and the Death card symbolizing this situation-ship will transform into a relationship.
That might have been a bit unfair but the point is Alex is using Tarot to justify choosing to stay in this place of not choosing her own peace and self-worth over this guy and is ignoring his real world actions and words, instead focussing on the promise of a soul-connection*.
Alex’s relationship with tarot is toxic.
*I’m not saying I don’t believe in soul-connections. I have certainly experienced the feeling with friends. What I mean is - a soul connection is great, but a real-world healthy, loving relationship is better.
TLDR - Tarot can be used in a toxic way. You are more susceptible to do so if you are driven to tarot through strong, ‘negative’ emotions.
Signs of toxic tarot use:
ignoring reality and focussing on what the cards ‘say’ especially when they don’t match
turning to tarot for emotional consolation
going into a reading hoping it reinforces your current beliefs and wants instead of being ready to hear message that is true and can benefit you in any way
buying 5 different readings from five different readers on the one topic.
Pick a reader you trust and that you are confident will give it to you straight in a compassionate and uplifting way
Me personally, (Abbey the Reader and Creator here at Moody Moon Things), I set the intention when reading for others and myself to gain helpful insights, useful truths and loving guidance towards the receiver’s highest, happiest, life.
<3
